I don't want to play anymore

My adventure with the withdrawal of my anti-depressant took a sharp turn downward this morning. I think I was working on day 5 without it (remembering, of course, that the tapering off has been going on for several weeks) and felt like I was doing well.

Then Chris was late getting back from the store, making it so that I missed the hair appointment I had scheduled for this morning.

And friends, I cried, and I cried, and I fell asleep, and I cried, and I did the dishes while I cried, and I took another nap, and I cried.

Naturally...my crying had very little to do with my hair appointment having to be rescheduled. But I certainly created a fun morning for my husband and children. It got to the point where I started trying to come up reasons for why I was crying. And when I spoke them aloud, they sounded even stupider than they had sounded in my head.

So, I took my dose of anti-depressant. Apparently a week is still too long to go without. It was horrible, although luckily my poor husband was able to deal with it fairly cheerfully, and got a lot of outside work done while I sobbed over the household chores.

On a not all that less slightly irritating note, Jeffy went into to the pediatric neurologist on Thursday. After being in the office for an hour and a half, we were told that it didn't appear that there was really all that much wrong...at least from a neurological standpoint. He became the fourth doctor to suggest physical and occupational therapy, which we've been on several waiting lists for for a few months now. He had nothing to say about the high rate of inflammation in Jeffy's body, other than that area was not his area but rather in the area of the rheumatologist who had referred us. Oh bother.

My great grandmother also passed away this week, so instead of going to Women' s Retreat, I will be flying over to Oregon to attend her memorial. I'm bummed about missing Women's Retreat, but really there was no thinking about which was more important. My grandmother's house (at least, where she lived before being put in a wonderful home for seniors needing assistance) complete with a beautiful garden, waterfall, and forest as her backyard, has always been the closest thing to heaven I have found on this world.

Back to work was up and down as well. I had some fantastic days with my kids, but some classes that were simply out of control. I'm looking forward to summer now...In my heart and mind in can't come fast enough.